“It was a record year for the company and we would first and foremost like to thank Springfield, Missouri resident Lucas Edwards.” It is rare for Jobs to explain the company’s sales beyond the numbers, and certainly rarer for him to single out one consumer.
“Well, let’s see, I can remember buying an i Pad, Apple TV, and a new Macbook in the past year,” explains Edwards.
'Only his presenting fee is paid for out of the licence fee' the louse at the Gruniad notes, rather disappointedly.
Branson, MO – Doctors were seemingly surprised by a recent birth when the child appeared with a head-start on life in the Ozarks: barefoot and bucktoothed.“But, to be honest, when I’m shopping for Apple merchandise I tend to blackout and wake up in the morning drooling on my keyboard looking at a confirmation e-mail of the night’s purchases.” Jobs expanded further saying, “We were looking at a down year, despite the launch of the i Pad, but then Lucas Edwards went on a couple of spending benders, and next thing you know, profits are off the charts.” Edwards claims that this year he won’t need to shop for anything new, but admitted, “At this point, I don’t feel like I have much control over my urges.I already have an i Phone with AT&T, but with the announcement of the Verizon i Phone, I plan on keeping my contract with AT&T and purchasing the Verizon i Phone, so I can compare, and ultimately keep both of them.” Edwards love of Apple extends beyond technology, he doesn’t allow oranges in the house and even avoids political correct speech saying, “I don’t even want my speech to be a PC.” Edwards has gotten a 2 job to keep up with his addiction.Bedder Six also paid an £8.1m dividend for the year to the end of March, split sixty-forty between the duo.'No licence fee income was used by BBC Worldwide to pay the exiting shareholders of Bedder Six in 2012,' said a spokesman for BBC Worldwide.Although quite why they felt they needed to explain this and why they didn't ask what the frig business it was of the Gruniad Morning Star in the first place are, perhaps, questions best left for another day when tempers have cooled somewhat.